I should know better

HOUND HAVOC

Well I did it. A long, long day in a leisure centre on the coast battered by gales, with the welcome company of J, who just wanted a day away from her husband - how wise.

Struggled through the usual suspcts in my own group with the added excitement of the deaf lady who wanted a critique of her dog there and then (I think it may have been audible in Norway) - "Madam he has no coat and you should not bring him out until he has" - and the traditional gormless steward presenting seen as unseen, the lovely animals missing essential bits, such as teeth and testicles.......as I write I suddenly realise I spent the best part of a day feeling dogs` balls. Well, it was raining anyway.....

Finished that group and was told no lunch as R might finish his classes any minute. Looked at R, making progress at the speed of the Beardmore glacier on a really cold day and felt thwarted and very hungry, having had a meagre breakfast of crispbreads at 7 . (Have lost three and a half stone and no Atkins breath for me.) Starving by the time I got in to face the hounds. Could have eaten a whippet.

Ah, yes. Whippets everywhere. Whippets are the new black. They are all elegant and they stare at you with liquid dark eyes, and they are all very similar. You could easily get lost in whippets.

But the joy of it was the puppies. Especially Olivia. Olivia the Basset at her very first show. She could see ittle point in standing still and really wanted to roll and have her tummy tickled. Her owner strained and struggled, biceps bulging, with a substantial weight of determined, happy hound. Of course she became best pupppy, and this seems to have impressed the hound people - except those with whippets. I should care. The lunch was really good. It featured skink. I love skink, and will be dieting it off for months. I`ve done it, cracked the hound group, but can see that skink will be my main memory of the day.