I should know better

Off again on the show trail, this year with Fidget. Despite being an inveterate mummy`s boy, he rather enjoys shows, which he sees as a matter of demonstrating his superiority to non-Papillons, of which altogether too many are allowed into dog shows. And he is overcoming his aversion to going round corners, although he would prefer to travel on my knee all the time.

So he is about to have one of his prolonged show baths this afternoon, involving soaking in 3 different horrendously expensive products (one imported from America) guaranteed to turn him out white enough to put snow to shame.

I know someone who is head colourist for a very prestigious firm of hair stylists, who has always had to deal with shampoo manufacturers. He also showed dogs, and knew all about dog shampoos. At that time a favourite to use on coated dogs was the human product "Wash and Go". He had a brainwave. He approached the manufacturers and suggested a new, lucrative market. They should sell it to the dog fancy, rename it "Wash and Win" - and quadruple the price. They would ( excuse the expression) clean up.

Alas, they were appalled. They talked about "degrading the product image". And so a great business opportunity was lost....no Alan Sugar there, then.

So this afternoon Fidget will be dunked, scrubbed and soaked in specialist products costing about as much per ounce as Chanel No 5.

And if I have time I`ll then wash my hair in whatever Tesco has been offering as a BOGOF this week.