I should know better

I spent some time yesterday in a disconsolate queue in the local chemist. We have several local chemist`s shops, all owned by the same firm, and all inadequate. One thing I particularly detest is the constant audio advertising, strongly featuring the more depressing complaints.

Usually I let it flow over me and concentrate on more uplifting things, such as bills to pay and shopping to do. I was in this daydream mode when a movement behind snapped me out of it and I heard the overhead voice coo -

"......At some time most of us have to face up to haemorrhoids....."

I was amazed at the picture this conjured up. I`m fairly double jointed, but that particular position would be quite beyond me ...

If anyone out there uses this particular method of visual diagnosis, please don`t let me know.